Lost Boy By. Clarissa McCall

So now what

Your out their now and people know who you are. weather your a popular blog or not whoever sees your blog will know that it's not your pen name but you.

So here's some fatherly advice from someone who's been out for a long time
this also applies to journal jams I feel like they shouldn't be as scary as people think they are because literally no one will even remember what you said so you may as just do what ever

-Just say whatever it is you want to say, blog whatever you want, because no one will even remember a week later what was said
-people only remember the feelings they had when you did something
-even if they do remember, it's not the end of the world so what the heck

so here goes.....

one time I made out with a girl named sarah potter I shouldn't of but I did, I was super thirsty. I didn't like her I wasn't attracted to her but I'm just one guy so i DEE KAY. so there you go I said something no one will care or remember, or care to remember

Lt. Dan

Lt. Dan was going to be my pen name but the whole class saw it on the big screen when I was making my blog. So yah.

This isn't something Big But it's me

If you watch the whole video congrats you're a great person and a real MVB

But if you get bored halfway through and leave I don't care it ight. It's kinda long and boring so yah 

Grant McColm You don't know 

• I like Chick Flicks 
• I love to do anything
• I spend a lot of time working or in my room playing guitar, trying to draw, writing 
• I actually like my parents their cool and they very lax about homework and grades and don't really yell at me
• I like to star gaze
• I like to just look at the moon
• I like the cold
• I sleep with a fan on my window open year round 
• I love people especially crazy people or outsiders their the most interesting like the people who run to class I want to talk to them but I can't because their running
• like the dude who swings his things around at lunch by the trailers or the dumpster, kinda by the softball field. I mean it's the most ridiculous thing and he's not even embarrassed about it he does it proud, he just puts his headphones on and goes to work. If you don't know who i'm talking about take a trip outside the commons and see him he's pretty kool. 

Bueford The Meiers Cow

Harsh words from the blonde dude

I don't know whats going so yah um yah

I dont know what to write 

I mean I play a a lot of instruments an music 

stuff

but the best way to write it I guess is to be playing it 

Buttz I don't want to make a video of me playing something so yep

Meiers is a Grocery Store and they have a cow named Bueford who sells baby back ribs but they don't pay him cause he's made of plastic

Youtube blocked my "Hi mom" for Copyright infringement  

Moo Cow Two

I had a Dream
I was Lying in a bed and a man was looking down at me
before i fell asleep again he said, "As  I always say fake it till you make it, Nurse scalpel."
then fell asleep a little worried but hey I trust him.
I was then standing on the beach looking.....just looking
and a man was swimming in the water. He started yelling, "HELP, SHARK, Help."
and I just laughed because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him
A old man then walked up to me as I was laughing and started to give me some strange advice.
He said,
               "first remember that a friend will always help you move, but a best friend will help you move a body.",  
                                He continued

"second if a police dog is chasing you, try not to dive into a tunnel, then on a seesaw, and through a hoop on fire because their trained for that."

"third Nostalgia isn't what it used to be."
I pulled out my phone to write this good stuff down and he said laughingly, "I used to get the strangest looks on the bus when I would try and use my phone then again it was 1982."
  I looked up but he was gone that's when I woke up To my psychiatrist saying that some day you just got to fill up the bath tub with skittles and pretend your Godzilla in a ball pit."
I told him, "Life has no remote you got to get up and change it yourself." then dropped the mic and walked out.
So here are some of G-rants life lessons
1. Build a man a fire keep him warm for a day, set a man on fire keep him warm for the rest of his life.
2. People who are rude why don't you slip into something more comfortable like a coma
3. Don't name your dog "Curiosity" unless you know that none of your neighbors have cats

I found a letter on the floor It wasn't for me but I read it anyway
 
   Dear Fork,
       You Have a Son, His name is Spork.
Love,
   Spoon
                 P.S. He has your hair

Dear Little Grant,

I'm just a Guy experiencing God's good green Earth for the first time. You know?

I have a big heart. That's because I'm a big guy, And big guys with big hearts are just big teddy bears, but no one wants to be the big teddy bear.

I make my wishes at 11:12 because the rush has died down and maybe God can hear me a little better.

 And I know God doesn't just stop listening after 11:11.

I like to think of things people my age don't do

I'd tell you some of these things but surprisingly they embarrass me

I like awkward moments in life because they make me happy

sometimes I look at something for a really long like floss at the store and I just look at it

and this is the first time I written a post with the writing in the center

I really like girls because yah

but some guys don't so more for me

I sometimes turn out all the lights in my room so it's dark and I take a lighter and I light it and just stare at the flame

I draw sometimes

I play guitar in my room

I live you know

I have a heart a beating just like not dead people 

so that could be a conversation starter right?

I Love Life 

Dear little Grant,

                      Even though your little right now you still have a big heart. Keep going even though life doesn't get to tough till around 6th grade keep going. Listen to Robert Ota don't be friends with Jordan He's kinda weird and will try to kiss your brother. But apparently he's straight so i dee kay. Move to Utah, it was a good choice you'll really like it. In 8th grade don't be mean to luke he's your brother love him. Don't call him gay all the time it actually hurt him. even though he's straight to. Don't be turd. Quit runescape earlier than 7th grade because it's a waste of life. Middle school was not really okay but could've been worse so I don't want to ruin it by giving you bad advice. don't take band in 7th grade you'll hate it it was really boring. umm 10th grade year go out with someone different it will hurt your friend spence if you don't. 11th grade don't worry you'll kiss someone late but you know it'll happen at least. 

12th grade..................................................

Pharmacist

Blue Ticket "Pharmacist"

The pharmacist fills all the pills day in day out
the pills for high blood pressure, erectile dysfunction, and gout.

He always knows who takes what
his neighbors son takes something not to mention
some pill called anti-excedrin
but it's really for depression

the dudes parents fight a lot
and the word divorce has come up more and more
he just goes to his room and takes his pills and shuts the door

at school he has friends
he hangs out with and talks with and acts happy
but they don't know he takes pills
and to him life is crappy

his parents have their share of problems
and so do the neighbors, and the others down the street
they all go to the pharmacist
and take drugs they never dare repeat

so the pharmacist fills all the pills day in day out
the pills for high blood pressure, erectile dysfunction, and gout.


(stockton this post is for you, not whats written but what it took to write it)

A Tour Guide For Tourists

Since you need help heres a tour guide, something your used to.

First off there's so many people who would like to take this class and who would actually not just show up and put a headphone in their ear and their head in their arms.
So if you take this class because you play football and Nelsons cool, that's fine just actually blog about something good, besides sports. Your whole life is sports I think you could spend like 20 minutes writing a blog other than that. If you play football or took this class because you like Nelson and you actually try, I love you and props to you because your great.

You Know Your A Tourist if.....
  You Just show up.
   You Listen to music in class when your really not supposed to.
  your Not trying at journal or blog.
  you Don't journal jam or volunteer for things.
  your Writing a post before fall break that says, "screw this post I want to chill for fall break."

"i'm not a tourist."
             Dick Nixon

I'll end with a poem I wrote

Moo Cow Moo 
                by. Grant McColm

 My wife said we needed to communicate more so I gave her my email
 thats not what I meant to do but it happened
  All Good Cows Moo Softly, but not all soft mooing cows are good

 So if you try to fail and succeed, what have you done succeeded or failed

 The world tells us to stop running away from our problems but maybe they just don"t understand that our problem is a bear  and if we stop running we'll get shrimped

the fact that i'm still waiting for google earth to get a layer that shows lost kickballs in a neighbors yard is depressing

and why is it that my whole life my Mom has told me I can be whoever I want to be but the police call it identity theft
and the next person to tell me i'm over exaggerating will get stabbed

Dear math,
Grow up solve your own problems.

Hate,
me


All the "experts say that caffeine is bad for you, sugar is bad for you, alcohol is bad for you
   but not to worry because that's bad for you.

so when I die, yes bury me in satin, but on my tomb stone write "did not forward chain mail to five friends."

Ducks. Did by. Grant McColm

How to clean and reuse reptile sand

The way to clean and reuse reptile sand is for one you need to a reptilian organism to crap in your sand.

There's only a few things I know in this life
I know that every time I go on the class website I watch throwback friday and I just watch carson destroy it i've seen it like 100 times and it makes me happy everytime
and I know that real life is good

After you got the reptile to do the bizz you take him out and put him in a safe place like a dishwasher to keep him wet.

But there's something to life I hate..... the please word
I think please has to much emphasis in life
it's a meaningless magic word "hey can I have that" "whats the magic word?"
screw that
I was working and I asked the lady if she wanted help with her groceries
She said quite harshly "yes Please"
it meant nothing to me and made you think she was a frickin rude women
what would have been a better response would be "Yes thank you, that's very nice of you"
the word please is as meaningless as the word sorry when a kid slugs you in the balls

You take his poopies out of the sand and then he can return to the habitaional zone

Fear the Leap Year

I fear that my parents post 4 times a day on instagram
it's probably not healthy

I fear the future
mostly what technology will bring
I mean we could've stopped inventing in like 1950 and we'd be just as well off

Women scare me their really intimidating
I fear my mother will read my blog and start criticizing my blog

But their is no courage without fear
so I guess just live life
because no matter how scared you is it will move on with or without you

Writers Block™

I wish people would stop commenting on Nelsons thingy that the hardest thing about blogging is "writers block". Like what the Buford  is writers block. Is it a block of whatever that writers use to write things on or worship or some stuff. Sounds kinda weird and if your Mormon or Jewish or Catholic I think there's a commandment that says don't worship false Idols or something like that, I Dee Kay. 

It Should just be called writers constipation if nothings coming out for you to write with

Because every Kiss begins with Kay

but I guess it does in more than one way 

because maybe you said to someone lets kiss

and they said "k"

then you MO for like ya

It's almost like that time my Dad told me

to not cross my eyes because they'll get stuck like that

well Dad I've crossed my eyes a bunch and I'm still scared that they'll get stuck

John "Chooch" Nichols I hoped I spelled your name right, but dude your a great guy and I'm not saying that like the last time I said it to you but because I really thought about what you told me at the WestLake Thunder game and your a great guy because you say Hi to me ever though I'm not a Tier one guy like yourself, If I had a son like you I wouldn't be disappointed 

For those who don't know

Tier 1= Varsity Athletes; Cheerleaders; Popular People

Tier 2=Rest of School

Tier 3= Don't need explanation 

 

I'd like to Thank Mom and Dad for bringing me into this world it's been a great life and the future will be Dopamine too. 

 

I'll end with a quote from Nelson

"It was in Her ear, Thats not how you do it!"- Nelson

P.S. 

If you have writers Block™ I think Maybe your trying to hard to force something that's not fully digested or thought out yet. I would recommend 2 Fiber Tablets by mouth with water and swallow don't let it dissolve it won't work. But consulate your Doctor first to find out if Writers Block™ is right for you. 

The Best Way To Get Approval From Your Peers Is To Not Need IT

Trying to write a Love Poem

Dear Her,

I saw her first 4 years ago
and into my chest
my heart sank really low
in their it laid to rest
she had to be the best

till I saw you that next week
because you were so gorgeous
I thought I was a freak
but that was just a fortress
a fortress of retreat

so now I see you, you say hi
and thats all you ever say
as you walk passing by

but still it makes my day

your smile and a "hey"

you know I like you
but do you like me
why does it have to be a mystery
that one time when you hugged me
it was nice but surprisingly
it made me wonder more
what the heck I met you for

From, love. sincerely,
That One Guy Down The Street 

TouchScreen

"It used to be hard to connect when friends formed clicks, but now it's even more difficult now that clicks form friends."

Nelson showed this great video in class "TouchScreen" I think that most everyone thought that it was a good poem, and might have given it a "Amen" or even a "hell yeah" in class but then returned to that same insta-crap world as before. I bet you don't even remember who said it. 

Technology can make a great servant but a bad master. 

Many lives are mastered by technology. Wasn't the point of the poem to show us how our lives are dominated by technology and how each waking moment is spent on instagram. Our world is dominated by facebook, porn, videogames, and the internet, and showing off what cool thing we're doing, and how many likes we get. I find it weird that T.V. shows these days sell more sex than a frickin Viagra commercial. I went to see Divergent a while back and mostly 14 year old girls were in attendance there, but in the middle of the movie the dude starts un-zipping her clothes and I say out loud so the whole movie theater can hear "Oh No not again" and everyone laughed, but continued to watch it. I've heard many a time "walk out of a movie if it gets bad", but in a theater of all Mormons no one moved an frickin muscle. I myself ashamedly sat there still, to watch the rest of the worst movie ever made, when I could have frickin walked out.  I hate phones with passion and yet I still have one, maybe it's not that phones are the problem but that we are. I deleted the social shit off my phone and guess what I have hours of unused time and doing cool things that don't go on instagram. Put your frickin phones away. people lived without them for 6000 years I bet you could live without it for a day.

"from the Garden of Eden, to the branches of Macintosh picking apples has always come at a great cost."

-Marshall Davis Jones

90's & Today + "Be More Like Luke"

What Makes us human. We are all the product of 90's love music. If thats how your parents work. We have all lived 18 years of hard earned true grit life. We've made it this far so lets go farther. We were once the kid jumping off the couch to make a sibling laugh. We were once kids that were in 1st grade. We were once kids learning to swim and ride bikes and catch bees in plastic bags.We were once kids Thinking that childhood is forever, Timeless, priceless and that well be in K through 12 for the rest of our life.  Now we're 18 and no longer kids and the only thing left is a nostalgia about the past.
"Be more Like Luke"
                 -Mr. Nelson
Luke's Creative, he's got a good blog, a great journal and 600 more page views
he gets the ladies and has clocked in at least 20 hours makeout time.
"Be more like Luke?"
               -Mr. Nelson
Thanks but no thanks
So Nelson I'm sorry if my blog sucks and my journal sucks harder but my creativity isn't like that. I can't express emotions on a blog or a 100 sheet*200 page*wide ruled* composition book. I'm different than Luke and thats fine by me.
Luke Doesn't run on the field and take a selfie with some tuba player named Jayden
Luke Doesn't take a chin master portrait with Frank Jackson in the back looking at him like he's high
Luke wouldn't walk around school dressed like Harry Potter all day for no reason
Luke Wouldn't bring a fishing pole to school and cast it at people in the commons
Luke Probably wouldn't even post this.
Luke and I are Quads born 1 out of 4 and yet were as different as it gets
Luke's short, I'm tall, He's blond, I'm Brunette, He's creative, I'm NOT.
Thats what make us Human. Not a F***ing robot

Yours Truly,
        Lt. Dan

Fishing

                    Why is everyone's post so depressing. Everyone talks about how much their life sucks but no one talks about fixing it. To me everyone is fishing. They say that oh my life sucks so people will comment and so "I can relate so much my life sucks". well you want to know what no one gives a fuck if your life sucks. Post something creative and mind expanding something thats going to be fun or interesting to read. It's easy to post something depressing and people think it's good because everyone thinks that their the only ones with problems, well your not. Everyone has a problem but the good ones are people who can make it through their problems and build something creative and inspiring. We're not meant to be here to feel bad for themselves. We're meant to be like what Remy the Rat in class said, humans "They discover, They create." no human got somewhere creating tears for themselves they got somewhere by not giving up and not letting their problems become weaknesses. They took what they had and ran. So the next time you want someone to compliment you don't start by saying "I'm so (fat, or ugly, or akward)" compliment the other person first and they will most likely return the favor. If they don't continue to compliment them as you see them and they will like to be around you and most likely start complimenting you.

Franz Reichelt

Different 

In Paris things aren't always so great

A Quote

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” 

― Dr. Seuss,

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
― Mark Twain

My question is why do people like words so much. Some people get chills from words spoken or read and i bet if I had put a quote about love or something like "I loved you but i was wrong." or something of that sort girls would think oh my gosh this is so touching because for some reason girls are always writing about love. But why do words have such an impact on humans. We speak english and we read it too but all the letters we write are just symbols that don't have a meaning like the letter T doesn't mean anything except when you see it you make a sound with your voice. you put multiple letters together you get a word like TOY the letters themselves don't mean anything but together mean an object that a kid plays with. If you put a B instead of T it would be Boy, now boy is is a gender and all we did was change one little symbol in the small three letter word. And if  you put those words together BOY TOY  it does not mean a boy object that kids play with. It means a boy who is used by a girl for certain things. All of the symbols make words and words together have a completely different meaning and it's really just amazing that these symbols create ideas in our head that when processed make us feel good inside or dark and creepy. 

"
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car."

That Quote probably made you laugh a little right? all those are just symbols that create a image or idea in your head that when comprehended you thought funny, i just think the Human is amazing and anyone who doubts A Creator needs to just look at everything in the whole frickin world and the species called Human and tell me that this is all a accident that were here by mistake, made by some big bang just here to live and die and nothing more and that's it nothing lives on. Ya Right.

"You only live once, and if you do it right once is enough"

Kranz

Crayons

"Never invest in any idea you can't illustrate with a crayon."
                        -Peter Lynch 

That is a very poetic quote and sense of mind. It's really cute and fun, BUT , there will always be buts, but is it realistic? simply put no. with that you have to wonder why crayons?? Lets take this way to deep and blow it way out of proportion and make everyone think i'm a person with some problems. Crayons are like people when a baby is born it's perfect no mistakes what soever. Same thing with a new fresh box of crayons there perfect and all pointy and look nice. BUT when a person grows up they have to experience life and with experience comes mistakes. Same with a box of crayons they need to be used in order to appreciate the gift of a crayon, but when you use them they break and become all gross and the paper rips off and the colors of the other crayons start to smudge into the once perfect crayon. Experience is key. Imagine if you knew what a crayon was BUT never used one in your childhood, but everyone else had. And you english teacher Nelson asks you to go back to those beautiful childhood memories of a care free world and write about crayons. You've never used one! you might know what they are but the happiness associated with them doesn't exist. That would be a sad life right? So be mad be sad but also be happy and be un-mad because those are emotions that should be experienced as well as crayons.

"broken Crayons still work to"
-Anonymous

Lincoln Logs Got Nothing

"Don't take life to seriously no one gets out alive"

Life is a Game 

and It's all the same

same as the 70's 

same as the 80's 

the only difference is you

you're here now

and not back then

so just imagine if you were your parents best friend

way back when

when all there was, was paper and pens

no smart phones

just home phones

and conversation was face to face

not texting when in the same place

The problem is your parents aren't your peers 

but they still will shed tears

when you make a mistake or maybe just need a break

so just imagine if were your parents best friend 

way back when

and it might be easier to get along with them 

maybe you'll have fun

but today all you are is done

done with the pressure 

done with school

done with your parents

and done with the tool you call a boyfriend 

because he just madeout with your best friend

and life's just throw a deep bomb

because you didn't get asked to the Senior prom 

and everything sucks

and you curse at ducks

because their life's inordinate 

all they do mindlessly fornicate 

with not even a soul mate 

and you can't make a clue

about what to do 

because that's life

and it resembles to much the high dive 

that you can't hack 

but there's no turning back 

so you take that step forward 

and maybe say a cuss word

but in the end you won't die

because it's really not all that high

so you go again and again 

because your the conquerer

not the concrete 

and that's it life's complete

so just keep taking a step forward

and you will go toward

the life that is yours

just open the doors 

and you'll be alright 

so with that goodnight 

Hats for the Homeless

Hats 

      As the famous warrior poet Ice Cube once said "It is a good day, if it does not require and AK.".

What does that have to do with hats you might say well nothing, but what does hats have to do with creative writing? I am unaware of the answer at this time, but Harold Miner probably knows and that's the joke. I bet there will be someone who takes "hats" to an emotionally high level that some people might say,  "Wait Thats Weird and if I find out who wrote this I'm going to make fun of them", or someone might think to themselves "holy moly my life is changed and i'm going to take a picture of this post and have it as my screen savor so I can remember it forever." when really both persons will forget the post in time. So the point maybe of "hats" is to say to the people in the class that intimidate you because their really cool is to say screw you give them the good old bird and write your guts out. The problem is I feel like everyone deep down wants to have the best blog that everyone is talking about. But the thing is that's only going to be a handful of people and the rest of us will blog on hoping for Harold Miner to click on our blog in class and read a line and then go "mmmm" and snap his fingers. In life not everyone is a winner.  Not all games end in a tie, not everyone should get a blue ribbon or a 1st place. It's okay to lose in life that way when you win you can freaking celebrate run around with your pants down and people will say "well they can do whatever they want because they won." And if your still reading this i'm impressed because i don't think its really making sense.

I can't wait to get old so I can mess with people that I don't really know, tell what's going on with the world or just act clueless. I want to be old and take a motorized wheel chair and roll down the street see some people flip them off, and they'll just say "oh well bless his heart he's old and disabled god love him" most of all I can't wait to hear the words roll off my tongue 

                   "well back in my day, you know we had Iphones and man that was the coolest thing, now kids these days are robots. The world aint what it used to be."

What I am really just trying to say is 

"yes"

The Last Mohicans Intro

My Intro

"You never get a second chance for a first impression" 

If is a word in the middle of Life.

So if you do not take a step forward you will always be in the same spot. 

Life is meant to be hard. 

A newborn baby always cries because any discomfort at all is literally the most discomfort they have ever felt.

      So if life isn't playing a fair game for you don't be freakin because you're experiencing something called life and it should be great and awesome even if it's horrible, because what's the opposite of life it's death. 

      

Life is to be EXPERIENCED so don't waste time on you're twitter, snapchat, or instagram, go outside with some friends and do something instagram worthy but then don't post it on instagram, because thats what life is supposed to be about. it isn't supposed to be limited to 5 inch screen and how many "likes" you get, because Likes are worthless! they are certainly given not earned.

It's bout YOU

So make it that way